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Friday, November 16, 2012

Negative Feedback on Natural Hair

Q: Hey Hun I just wanted to ask you how you dealt with negative feedback and reactions to your hair? Has it effected your relationship(s)? And how long have you been natural? - msishmac91

Negative feedback is to be expected. I was readily prepared for this, as I had experienced it before during a previous transition. I was about 20 years old, when I decided to embark on my first transitioning phase. My boyfriend at the time would mention how he didn’t like the change. He was accustomed to seeing me with straight hair. I succumbed to the pressure and soon after made a date with the beautician.

I remember on my last transition when I told this guy at work that I was going natural, he voiced how he was completely against it. He even suggested a nice Dominican salon that he could take me to. This truly showed me that the minds of people were poisoned to only accept a European standard of beauty and that I wouldn’t fit. Luckily, I was confident enough to not let it change my mind.

My mother wasn’t too fond of my decision to go natural as well. Once, during my transitioning phase, I asked her what she thought about my hair and she said that I needed a perm. Can you believe that?  I was so intuitive with her disposition on natural hair that I should have been a fortune teller.  I was comfortable with myself that I only asked to get a chuckle out of her response.

Another time was out on a date at a local diner. My date was someone I had known since I was about 16 years old. You would think that meant something, but even he had something to say. While there, he mentioned how my hair was a reflection of him. I told him in so many words that I could care less about how he felt about my hair. We have since stopped talking, but that wasn’t pertaining to my hair.

Overall, natural hair has effected my relationships for the better.  Its made me more aware of the superficial people around me.  Being natural for a little over 4 years has truly shown me how ignorant some people can be.  Have you experienced any similar negativity?

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